Blue Camel Inn
by therhoda
Summary: Four guys, a bored teen, welcome to the Blue Camel Inn.
1. Roads

Author's note- I wrote this story but it wanted to be two different chapters. As it was written for contest with a word limit this poor chapter got cut as unnecessary. I liked the dialog though and though it added to the following chapter. So here you a prequel, of sorts.

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On a road through a scrub land somewhere in Shangri-la, a jeep with four men is heading towards the western horizon. Dust seems almost a part of this group of weary travelers, making it apparent they have come a great distance with no rest.

"I'm Hungry," comes from the back seat for what seems to be the millionth time.

"Shut..." comes the start of an annoyed shout, that soon chokes off into sounds of coughing, hacking and spitting. "Shut up you chibi black hole!" A laboring Gojyo finally manages to yell. "Shit, I can't even yell anymore. Hakkai how long have we been in this god damned waste land anyway?" Knocking his head back against the side of the jeep in tiredness.

"Now Gojyo, it hasn't been that long." The monocled brunette replies a bit tersely. It seems the latest leg of their journey though this wasteland has stretched even his considerable reserves to the limit. "According to the map we should be at a town of some size by this evening. If there are no delays."

At this the blonde next to him raises his head from the neck rest. "An inn?" He inquires in a deadly serious tone.

"Yes, I should think so." Comes Hakkai's even answer.

"Hakkai! Don't kid with us man," Gojyo says making hopeful liquid filled eyes at the driver. "I mean it if there is a chance of us having beds..." Gojyo's eyes begin to glaze he seems to drift off, into day dreams of pillows, covers and nubile willing women.

"Then there will be no delays," Sanzo fiercely states before turning to face the two in back of the jeep. "You two idiots hear what Hakkai said? I **will** not have anymore wasted time. We will make it to the inn." Pronouncing this with a face that promised a painful death to anything that should be the cause of such a thing, He turns to the front and seems to go back to sleep.

"An inn." Goku says wonderingly, "They will have food won't they Hakkai?" his eyes pleading with the driver to reassure him that it is so.

"Yes, Goku they should have a kitchen in an inn." Comes the automatic reassurance from the driver.

The only reply is a soft chant of, "Food, food, food..." from the saru.

Lost in their own dreams of baths, beds and other amenities they have missed during the long stretch of traveling, his companions don't even notice Goku ending his chant and replacing it with a quiet count. "Thirty-six, Thirty-seven, Thirty-eight... "

"Oi!" Gojyo interrupts when he notices, "What are you counting, you stupid monkey?"

"Forty, Forty-one.." Goku tries to continue despite the question.

"I didn't know monkeys could count," Gojyo continues his energy renewed on hearing a town was close at hand. He leans over and shakes Goku, making him clench his fists and completely lose his train of thought.

"Damn it Gojyo, I was counting! Now I have to start over." The chimp bristles back at the irritant. "I want to know how many days it has been since I got real food!"

From the front seat comes a placating, "Now Goku when were you counting from?"as Hakkai uses a distraction move of long standing.

"From the last inn that had those tasty meat buns. You know Hakkai the one where we all had our own rooms." Goku says, starting to salivate as he remembers .

"Leave it to a monkey to remember where we stay by what they served to eat." jeers Gojyo from his side of the seat.

"Yeah, like you are any better! How do you tell them apart you ero kappa? Hmm?" Goku asks tilting his head to one side.

"I can tell them apart you stupid monkey," comes the fast answer.

"Really? Then how many days ago was it you stupid cockroach?" Goku presses feeling his advantage.

"I just need more information." Gojyo stalls, trying to remember any identifying characteristics the inn might have had.

With a quick glance towards Gojyo, Hakkai steps in to save him. "The number you are looking for is forty-two Goku. It has been forty-two days since we have been in an inn that served food."

"Really, that long?" Goku sits back aghast at how long he has been eating the Hakkai's basic cooking.

"Fuck! No wonder I want out of this damn jeep," Gojyo mutters as he slouches back into his corner of the back seat.

A loud "Kyouuh" comes from Hakuryu followed by a few sputters and jerks.

"Apologize Gojyo!" Hakkai calls back to Gojyo in a teachers scolding tone. He changes it to a softer tone and consolingly says, "He didn't mean it Hakuryu, we are all tired." Hakkai pleads as their pace starts to drop.

"No,"Gojyo bites out sitting up straight and looking toward the driver in disbelief, "I am not apologizing to a flying rat."

The sound of a gun shot breaks the conversation as the wind from the passing bullet caresses the side of Gojyo's face blowing his crimson hair to the side.

"I will not sleep outside with you morons another night. At least Hakuryu does something for me, and I will kill you if that will get me to an inn and a bed quicker, you useless idiot." The pissed off blonde in the front seat reenters the discussion quite forcibly. "Now apologize to Hakuryu you stupid pervert!" Sanzo spits out at Gojyo with a emphasizing look at the gun.

Gritting his teeth Gojyo does just that. "I am sorry Hakuryu, I didn't mean it." Turning to face Sanzo he continues with, "You on the other hand, are damned. You miserable excuse for a monk."

With disdainful snort, Sanzo turns back to the front and gets comfortable in his seat.

"Don't ignore me, you gun happy shitty excuse for a monk!" Gojyo leans forward behind Sanzo's car seat. "I am not done talking to you trigger pulling maniac, you could have hit me!"

"Like I would waste a bullet on you," is Sanzo's terse answer.

Huffing to himself, Gojyo slouches back again and mumbles about monks, guns and one of these days.


	2. Default Chapter

This is my contest entry for the "42 days contest" at one of my haunts, ffnet Authors' Message Board (link can be found in my author bio). There are 3 elements and a word count to be followed. Also no pairings or lovey dovey stuff allowed. So here it is. Enjoy.

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Blue Camel Inn

By

Therhoda

At an inn, in a medium size town on the western road, a bored female teen looks at an empty registry thinking resignedly of her night ahead. 'I wonder if there will be guests at the inn tonight.' No sooner had she completed the thought than she hears the telltale sounds of footsteps on the front porch. There are several male voices coming through the door and they seem to be bickering quite loudly.

"We made it didn't we?" comes a deep, irritated voice.

"No thanks to you! You pervy water sprite," is the slightly higher pitched, but no less irritated reply.

The teen hears a click followed by a third voice saying, "Shut up you stupid morons, just go inside!"

The door opens, and light of the setting sun is momentarily blocked by the silhouettes of four people walking into her inn.

"Welcome," she greets automatically. Upon getting a better look at the foursome as the door closes, she continues with. "May I help you, gentlemen? "

The handsome, dark haired brunet, who had opened the door for the others comes forward to her desk and politely asks, "Do you have any available rooms?"

The teen clerk smiles and responds to his question with one of her own. "How many?"

Finding it difficult to concentrate she is trying not to stare in curiosity at the foursome. The clerk notices they are a diverse group. There are four people, who appear to be men, although the one in the back is completely covered by a cloak and so may be a woman. One of them is actually a young boy with brown hair, another is tall red haired man, then there is the cloaked one and finally the brunet in front of her.

"Four if you have them," the brunet answers with a slight smile of his own.

The youngster and the red head seem to have been the ones arguing on the porch. They continue to glare at each other even as their companion was talking to her, like children who have had their sweets taken away.

"Yes. We have four rooms, how long will that be for?" she inquires, beginning to warm to this patron. His politeness and attention making her want to give him the best rooms she has.

"Tonight," responds a surly male voice from underneath the cloak at the back of the group. Answering both the question of his sex and who is in charge of the group in her mind.

"But Sanzo..." the younger man with brown hair whines.

"Shut up!," is the cloaked man instantly replies. He turns to face away from the doorway but not enough to face the desk and continues, "This isn't a vacation you know."

"You are wasting your time, your mightiness. This monkey brain can't hold onto his owners commands for that long," the taller, red haired man interjects.

The youngster whips around to face him. "Who you calling a monkey you pesky cockroach?"

"What did you call me?" the red head marches over and gets in the younger man's face. Pulling the cigarette out of his mouth to say, "Say that to my face."

"Red Cockroach!" the youngster repeats himself loudly.

A white fan appears from out of nowhere in the cloaked man's hand and is then applied forcibly to the craniums of both the loud combatants in record speed.

A quiet clearing of the throat from the brown haired man drawls her attention back, "Miss, please excuse my companions." He bows slightly then looks back up at her. Shrugging his shoulders, he explains, "We have been on the road for 42 days and have started to wear a bit thin on each other. Are there four rooms available for us?"

She looks down at her lodging book to hide her wandering attention and embarrassment at having been caught watching them. Glancing back up to him with a quick reply. "Yes, we have four rooms."

"What about food?" The youngster of the group had moved up to the front of the desk and begins to barrage her with questions. "Do you cook? Is there a restaurant?" He then turns his attention to the man who had been talking to her, bouncing on the balls of his feet he asks. "Hakkai can we eat now?" He gets more and more excited, the more he talks about food the more animated he becomes. He is starting to bob to the left and the right of the brown haired man and is chanting, "Food, Food!"

Hoping the information is helpful to the customers or at least the younger one, she tells them, "The menu for tonight's supper will be posted on that board over there," and she points to a large board with papers pinned to it. "Normally, it is posted..." she pauses to look at the clock on the wall before answering, "an hour from now, if you gentlemen will be hungry then."

Deciding to place them in best adjoining rooms, and to allow them to get settled before dinner, she hurries to pick up the right sets of keys. She comes out from behind the counter. Looking up into the dark haired man's pleasant green eyes she says, "If you will just sign the registry there, I can take you up to your rooms."

The lanky red head saunters over and says with a confident smirk, "So which room are you in tonight, beautiful?" Before she has a chance to process the question, much less form an answer, the white fan appears again to knock the gentleman on the back of the head with a loud and painful thwack.

"Don't you ever stop, you stupid moron?" the cloaked man questions resignedly.

The red haired man turns to the one with the fan. "You poor excuse for a..." he begins, but is broken off by an elbow to the solar plexus from the still smiling brunet. Who, despite his charm, is starting to disturb her with that smile.

"Okay, Hakkai I get the message. No..." he breaks off as he is elbowed again, and glares at the brunet for his interference.

Shaking her head over the humor of this behavior, she takes them upstairs. She has given them the rooms at the end of the hall, the two connecting rooms on each side. With a gesture, she points them out. "Well here you go," she says handing the four keys to the still smiling person before her. "Rooms 102 and 104 connect on this side," she gestures to her left. "Rooms 101 and 103 across the hall connect also," she nods her head to the right. "Please enjoy your stay at the Blue Camel Inn."

With this, she takes her leave and starts back to her desk, thinking to herself. 'One thing is for sure, tonight's visitors aren't the sedate pilgrims we normally see.' Smiling at what she has seen of the new guests, she settles back at her desk with a smile and looks forward to the remainder of the day ahead.

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Well here it is my first contest entry ever. It has been in some form or another for over a month now. But ,IT has done some wacky things along the way like going into Mitosis without asking, or how about having no plot, even thought there was supposed to be one there. I hope you enjoyed it! 


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